So I sent Stan a copy of How to Become a Chick Magnet as his birthday present, and to be honest, even I have been amazed at what this guy has been up to since then. In short, he’s taking massive action, and already getting incredible results.

Flicking quickly through the program in the book, Stan is already well into implementing Steps 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 9 and Skills 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 13. It’s incredible. The program is deliberately ordered so you take the Steps and learn the Skills that make the biggest difference first. And that’s exactly what he’s doing. He’s even doing some stuff I’d never thought of, that I’ll have to put in the next edition. The man’s a machine!

And what do you know… this stuff really works. He’s already finding that women are drawn to him now. He’s not desperate any more. He’s more approachable. He’s doing what he wants and becoming a better man, on his terms. He’s no longer expecting women to make him happy; he’s making himself happy. And the result? Women at work, at dancing, at gigs he plays; they’re all taking an interest in him now, where they weren’t before.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s that to get anywhere with anything, you need to take action. That’s the only way to achieve results. Nobody is going to do this for you. Women are attracted to men who act, even in the face of doubt and uncertainty. We need to learn what action to take to get the result we want, and then get off our proverbial behinds, get out there and take it.

I can’t wait to hear from Stan again to see what he’s up to next, and how he’s doing. It’s inspiring. This stuff is just awesome. If you want to start having the success that Stan’s having, start taking action by grabbing the book and getting out there. I can’t wait to hear how you go!

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1. Give Yourself Credit

Jenny had to leave early to get back to work, but Derrick and I continued on as the topic of the conversation turned increasingly towards every man’s favorite subject: women, dating, attraction and seduction. It turned out that Derrick and I had even more in common than just the family background of dominant mother and ineffective father: a lethal combination when it comes to setting a man up for future interactions with women. We talked about what makes a man attractive to a woman; and what repels them. We talked about the importance of being authentic, and how us “sensitive” guys often learn implicitly to be insincerely inoffensive and “nice” in our interactions with women; and then wonder why we seem to end up powerless- like our fathers were. We talked about flirting, and about how simply realizing earlier this year that it was a good thing to tease women totally transformed the way I relate to them. I told him my cracker story of the 18-year-old with the DD’s, which I’m sure is bound to end up in some future edition of How to Become a Chick Magnet. We talked about the importance of a man being able to dance, if he wants to side-step a lot of the obstacles that us shy guys face when it comes to meeting women and getting up close and personal with them.

Probably the best thing about my conversation with Derrick was reminding myself just how far I’ve come when it comes to attracting and relating to women. I tend not to give myself credit for the amazing progress I’ve made, just because there’s always more to learn, and a new level to reach. Plus I have such high standards that whenever I fall short, I end up feeling like a complete fraud regardless of how much progress I’ve made; and when I’m not feeling authentic, that feels bad to me. Which is why fake pick-up lines feel awkward to me. Other guys might get away with them, but I end up feeling self-conscious unless I’m being “real”. Of course it turns out that the “real” me isn’t the one that’s been turning up for most of my life: that’s the old emotionally-repressed fake I’m-trying-to-get-you-to-like-me-so-I-don’t-get-hurt me. We talked a lot about the importance of being authentic when relating to women too, and how “faking it” doesn’t work for guys like us. For us, learning to be good with women is more about getting in touch with our true inner selves. The repressed chick magnet within, if you like.

By the end of the conversation, Derrick was inspired and said he could see me coaching men on how to attract women more effectively. “Before our conversation, I just didn’t know what to do. Now, I can see that there are things I can do to make a difference.”, he said. I’m going to send him a free copy of my book too, which I know is going to blow his mind with possibilities. I can’t wait to see what results he gets when he start applying it; I’m excited. And if you know how draining to excitement Chronic Fatigue is, you’ll know that’s a big deal. In return, he’s going to send me some homeopathic remedies. Fair swap I think. I already know he’s going to take action on Skill #1: Learn To Dance. Imagine if he were to implement Skills 2 thru 22 as well; this guy’s going to be unstoppable!

Meanwhile, I’m off to do some more emotional healing work via Breathwork. Several people in the last few weeks have mentioned this technique and although I’m a slow learner, when I start getting the same message via multiple places I do start paying attention. Ditching emotional baggage is one of the steps in my book on attracting women, and although I’ve already done a lot of work on this area of my life, I suspect there could be more to do. And if Derrick reckoned Breathwork helped heal his Chronic Fatigue, I’m willing to give it a go. Attract more women and get well all at the same time… what I bonus that would be.

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